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tears fall as the world keeps spinning - RIP Tweek and Grim [Mar. 26th, 2008|03:55 am]
dont matter
[mood |crushedcrushed]

its seems that life just keeps getting worse. i cant handle the deaths that have so recently happened. i dont know what to do with myself anymore. it seems (for those of you who dont know) that my beloved rat grim and my friend tweek have both died in the same day.  so of course this has just been utterly terrible the past two days. 

i have found my world completely shattered and i do not believe i am strong enough to rebuild it. however, i have to swallow the pain and keep on truckin because i have alot more bad times coming at me. 

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looking at old enteries [Mar. 5th, 2008|01:26 am]
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looking back at some of the enteries that i had posted and others posted and of course the comments. i realized that poor jimmy gave me everything i needed. its funny though.  i still havent forgiven myself for all the things i did that hurt him.  most days i have a moment or two that i yell at myself for it. and to be honest if i could go back in time and fix things.. i would. it also makes me think of everyone else. i know i've done plenty to all you guys. 

so to everyone that has gotten hurt because of me... i am sorry
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omg its lj [Mar. 3rd, 2008|10:31 pm]
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holy fucking shit. its been forever since i even thought about this place. i cant believe my journal still exists. i was sure i wouldnt be able to log onto here. lol. well, im off for another thousand years.  
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(no subject) [Nov. 21st, 2004|10:58 am]
dont matter
Your element is Rain: Sad, lonely, distant and
unique. You are quite distant from emotion and
people, but you have been made this way by one
thing or another. Your are truly unique yet
fail to see it, and are quite creative be it in
art, music, writing, etc.. You used to let
people in now you don't even bother to try
having been hurt so many times in the past.
Your attitude is that you don't need anyone but
yourself, people are just trouble waiting to
happen. But you really do want to trust someone
no matter if you see it or not, deep down your
waiting for someone to come and set you free.
This kind of depression can turn dangerous,
don't let them get to you. Not everyone in the
world will hurt you, humans are humans and are
not perfect. So most likely sooner or later
you'll meet someone who feels like you do and
perhaps your shell will eventually disappear.

.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla
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(no subject) [Nov. 20th, 2004|12:08 pm]
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Your Beauty lies
in Individuality. Different, amazing, and all your
own. You like be set apart
from all others and most love that you do. You are
solitary at times, but for
the most part, there is no greater compliment to
you than someone telling you
that you are different. You're most likely a bit of
a fighter and you hate it
when anyone attempts to change who you are. You
wear what you want, look how you
want and don't let anyone tell you what do to. You
can be a little immature at
times and have trouble dealing with authority and
asking others for help. You
like to do things yourself and are independent
almost to a fault. But, people
still find your individuality amazing and the fact
that no matter what happens
or what anyone else anyone thinks about it, you
will not change who you are.</font>

Some Things
That Represent You:

Dark, Fire Animal: White Tiger Color:
Bold Colors, Odd
Colors Song: Just They Way I Am by Angel
Expression: Smirk

Bloodstone Mythological Creature: Phoenix,
Dragon Sign:
Leo Planet: Pluto
Hair Color: Unnatural Colors Eye


"You laugh because I'm different. I laugh
because you're all the same."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla
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(no subject) [Nov. 19th, 2004|06:09 pm]
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(no subject) [Nov. 18th, 2004|05:10 pm]
dont matter
JaiCollapse )
JaiCollapse )
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(no subject) [Nov. 16th, 2004|10:47 pm]
dont matter
[mood |?????]

i got phone call today. went kinda like this....

*ring ring* hello...
(my mom).. hey! i was doing the grout for the floor and just wanted to tell u that the gutters u did are really good ... much better than mine.
(me).. ok,
(my mom).. im cleaning whats left and i only gotta clean a lil bit of crumbs outta the ones u did but the ones i did i have to saw out.. have u ever tried to saw cement?
(me).. noo, but i cant imagine its easy, lol
(my mom).. no its not, lol. but i thougt i'd just call and say thank u for helping me, u did a great job. and jess too. im glad she came over.
(me) *thinking::: did she just say she was glad to have my gf over?? hmmm... thats odd but then again she doesnt exactly know im going out with her, heehee.
(my mom) well i'll let u go now bye!

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo k. can anyone even guess how im feeling right?? anyone wann guess?? lol.
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(no subject) [Nov. 15th, 2004|10:45 pm]
dont matter
[mood |lovedlove struck]
[music |my only one.... yellow card]

well my weekend was pretty good. i spent 4 1/2 hour with my girlfriend, the sad part bout that was that i was tiling my mother's kitchen floor the entire time. but at least i got to see her. i miss her soo mucho much. i never thought it was possible to fall in love again after all thats happened but i have... i love jai. shez my everything. honestly, i cant imagine how my life would be right now without her. i also got to eat willington pizza on saturday.. and leighbee can tell you willingotn pizza rules all!!!! its better than any pizza you can get here. so aside from all the things that i am having a hard time with lately... im good. and i cant wait to see jai again. i gotta get a really good pc of her soon. so i can run it through the scanner n post it cuz aparently everyone wants to see a pic of her. i may have one of her n em but its not developed yet so im not sure. im gonna try to develope it tomorrow... but i might not get a chance to. well thats bout it.

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in need [Oct. 24th, 2004|12:05 pm]
dont matter
[mood |depresseddepressed]

i dont know what i want to say......... i went to two parties this weekend n both times i felt anti-social... maybe i should just give hanging with ppl. i didnt think it was possible but i feel the way i felt in ashford. maybe thats another reason i've been doing these things lately. as i sit here right now..... i tell myself i can last without nething... but i know i feel like i cant. it would be easier if i felt like god loves me but jus like in ashford .. i feel he hates me. i need something....... but to make sure i dont do nething....im gonna take a walk n see where i end up. tty guys l8er i guess.
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